For the Goddess

“The diseases of the mind are more and more destructive

than those of the body.”

- -

Cicero

“In a disturbed mind, as in a body in the same state,

health can not exist.”

- -

Cicero

While cleaning and organizing my array of books, (you see I have this psychological disorder called obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), e.g. obsessed on being organized) I hit upon a book I bought last January. It’s a psychological book entitled Sybil ¹,a true story about a woman possessed by sixteen separate personalities. I haven’t read it yet because of different circumstances in work. After organizing my stuff, I started to read the book from

8pm

until

12:30am

. I just couldn’t put down the book. Anyway this is not a review about the material on its technicalities but a reflection on how it affects reality. I would not talk about the book; I’ll just give to you the substance and leave the excitement of it.

Family is an important factor in molding one’s personality. Our character is reflected from the way we were shaped and how we were educated by our parents and our environment. From that, I just realized that every individual who are going to have a child should be properly educated about Child Psychology to better understand the essential way of rearing a human person, because our parents are the first teachers from the moment our life begun. It is essential to bring not only the physical health care but also mental care in the barrios. We must also inculcate the essence of treating every people as human beings, not an animal or a thing, but as a composite of body and soul.

By understanding the human nature and essence, nourishing our minds, and pampering our hearts, we may effectively annihilate Sybil in our community.

“Humanity is the equity of the heart.”
      - Confucius

“We cannot despair of humanity,

since we are ourselves human beings.”
      - Albert Einstein

¹ A book by Flora Rheta Schreiber, 1973. Warner Books.

New York

            

Gusto  mo bang

maging receptionist? Narito ang 30 characteristics para malaman na kabilang ka na nga sa mga dyosa ng kagandahan sa Sherwood Hills:

        1.      Kung sa isang araw, mga anim na beses ka kumain

2. Receptionist lang ang may kakaibang uniform sa company at sa balat ng lupa         

3.  Hindi lilipas ang isang lingo na hindi kumakain ng pseudo foods (o di tunay na pagkain or yung fastfood.

4.      May mga bagay na magkakatulad kagaya ng shoes, blouse, skirt, sandals, bags, brassiere or panties, at marami pa.

5.      Kung may tapang ka na mang-okray ng ibang emplyeyado or boss para ipaglaban ang tama.

6.      Kung nasuspindi ka na ng (di bababa sa isang lingo) lampas sa isang beses.

7.      Hindi ka na marunong ng tamang grammar at nagkakaintindihan na kayo ng Koreans, Japanese at Chinese.

8.      Magaling ka sa scrabble, text twist, boggle at iba pang games ( malimit laruin pag walang magawa)

9.      Kaya ng powers mong magwork ng 15 hours a day.(basic + OT)

10. Kaya mo ring tumunganga ng 8 hours a day ( off-peak season )

11. Lagi kang present sa SM Dasmariñas , adik sa divisoria, at mahilig sa tiangge

12. Pumapasok pag holiday; Christmas, New Year, Nov 1, etc…………

13. Kung anu-anong kaadikan ang ginagawa tulad ng mag-inuman ng toyo at pulutan ang monggo bread.

14. Nireregaluhan lahat pag Christmas (dati yun, ewan ko ngayon!) at laging madaming natatanggap na gifts pagpasko mula sa kung sino sino.

15. Sawang sawa na sa memo na ginagawa na lang na scratch.

16. Magkaroon ng tip araw araw na galing sa kung kanikaninong golfer

17. May training ka para maging “yaya sisterhood”

18. Marunong ka din gumawa ng sariling day-off

19. Ikaw ang favorite utangan ng mga tao kasi akala nila mayaman ka pero ang totoo mahirap ka din tulad nila

20. May active participation ka sa sports tulad ng golf, bowling, volleyball, table tennis, badminton, at eating competition.

21. Hindi mo naging ugali ang mag-utos sa maintenance, kusa mo na lang aayusin ang mga buhol buhol na wires, magwalis, magpunas, magbuhat ng kung anu ano, etc.

22. Kailangan may sarili kang diskarte sa pagtatago ng pagkain, tsinelas, at iba pa kapag padating na ang mga bossing

23. Kaya mo kumain ng heavy breakfast in two minutes

24. Makapal ang mukha mo sa panghihingi ng brewed coffee

25. Kailangan din ay certified “mama sang” ka.

26. Dahil addict ka swimming, kaya andyang nasunog ang balat dahil sa beach, o mag-disintegrate ang skin dahil sa chlorine ng pool

27. Walang iwanan kahit sa sakit tulad ng ubo, sipon, at UTI.

28. Suki kayo ng massage parlor

29.  Sikat ka sa Sherwood Hills dahil lagi ka nakikita. Kinaiinggitan ng mga “bangus” na ayaw magpakatotoo.

30.  Kasalanan ng iba, napupunta sa iyo dahil nga sikat ka at lagi naka-smile.

Mula sa pinagsama-samang

experience

ng mga

receptionist.

Copyright^® 2006

 

Dahil di kami makatulog ng room mate ko(itago natin sa pangalang Duday), kung anu ano na lang ang naging topic namin nung isang gabi.

Bigla ko din naisip kung anu ba talaga ang hitsura ng aswang. Narito ang mga katangian ng aswang na naisip namin at di namin alam kung totoo nga ba. Note: Paki-confirm na lang kung may alam kayo sa mga ss:

o       Di tao di hayop pero lumilipad, ibig bang sabihin may pakpak? Kung totoong may pakpak, anu kaya ang dimensional structure ng pakpak nya? Gawa ba ito sa tela (parang kay Cap. Barbel), o part din ng Integumentary system ng tao? Kung wala naman syang pakpak, paano sya lilipad? Lumilipad nga ba sya?

Counter argument: Kung hindi sya lumilipad, paano sya nakakapunta sa matataas na lugar tulad ng bubong ng bahay?

o       Nagiging dahilan ng miscarriage ng mga pregnant women dahil mahilig daw sa mga ipinagbubuntis pa lang. Tama bang isipin na humahaba ang mala- blade na dila at tumatagos sa bubong para sipsipin ang fetus?

o       Kayang magbago ng anyo, minsan tao (usually matandang may mahaba at puting buhok)minsan hayop (pusa naglalandi sa bubong). At sabi ng kilala ko, malalaman daw ang anyo nito kapag tiningnan ng pabaligtad o patiwarik.

o       Sa mga Filipino movies, palaging mukhang gusgusin ang mga aswang; parang walang tamang hygiene. Bakit sa foreign films sosyal ang mga aswang, parang mga elitista (naka-tuxedo, with wine at take note: papa ball!)

o       Hindi rin daw tumitingin sa mata kapag nakikipag-usap sa mga tao ang mga ito. Palihis at matalim kung tumingin.

o       Talaga bang namamana ang pagiging aswang? May kinalaman ba ang genetics dito? Sabi nila, sinasalin lang ito sa mga susunod na lahi sa pamamagitan ng ritual. Kung anu man ito, di ko rin alam.

o       Mas mabuti raw na maging kaibigan ang aswang kesa magnanakaw. Sa magnanakaw hindi ka sure na ligtas ka sa pagnanakaw; sa aswang, sure na may immunity ka sa atake nito.

Ilan lang yan sa mga puzzle sa isipan namin simula nung gradeschool at hanggang ngayon wala pa ding linaw. Lagi na lang pinagmumulan ng misteryo at takot pag ganun na ang topic. Minsan naniniwala kasi sabi ng mga matatanda, at sa modernong panahon nagbabago na ang paniniwala lalo pa’t may mga taong empiricist at kasabihan ng marami ang “To see is to believe”.

Natapos din ang topic tungkol sa aswang ng wala kaming matinong conclusion. Mas maganda pa ring maiwan ang ganitong misteryo.

Natulog na lang akong hindi lumilingon sa may bintana.

 

Hindi ko alam na bago pa pala ako maging nurse e marami pa akong sakit na pagdaraanan. Babanggitin ko ulit ang katagang “ouch” para malaman ng tao na nasasaktan ako.

Second year nursing student ako sa isang unibersidad dito sa

Cavite

. At dahil sa aking course kung saan mas prone kami sa infection mula sa bacteria at viruses, required kami dumaan sa iba’t ibang vaccination para mapangalagaan ang aming mga sarili. Isa na rito and Hepa B Vaccine( proteksyon laban sa Hepatitis B)

            Natatandaan ko pa yun vaccine nung gradeschool pag nakikita ko yung iniwang pilat nito , ngayon ko lang nalaman na BCG vaccine pala iyon o Bacillus Calmette Guerin ( Proteksyon laban sa Tubercullosis at Leprosy ). Naawa ko sa classmate ko kasi halos lumabas pa ang sipon kakaiyak bago at matapos ang bakuna. Sabi kasi ng nagbabakuna parang kagat lang daw ng langgam yun e iba siguro naramdaman niya. Hindi ko na mataandaan kung gaano kasakit yun, basta alam ko hindi ako umiyak.

            Ilang beses na rin ako nakatikim ng injection ng anesthesia pagpupunta sa dentista at magpapabunot ng milk teeth. Biro mo sa ilang ngiping natanggal sa akin, ilang injection kaya yun. Di ko na rin mabilang.

            Din na rin iba sa akin yung pagkuha ng blood sample pag magpapamedical. Sa edad ko isang beses pa lang ako na-confine sa ospital, nung kolehiyo . Tatlong araw din ako tumigil dun dahil sa typhoid fever at di rin ako nakaligtas sa mga injection at IV.

            Nagpapasalamat ako nung nagtatrabaho na ako dahil simpleng sakit na lang nakukuha ko tulad ng sipon, ubo, sore eyes, trangkaso, gasgas, singaw, sakit ng ulo, diarrhea at dysmenorrhea. Hindi ko na kailangan maconfine at magpa-injection.

            Pero noong isang taon lang ( May 2005 ),nakagat ako ng aso sa paa at nagdugo. Dahil alam ko na ang rabies virus, agad akong pumunta sa clinic para sa bakuna ng anti-rabies. Sa isang session nakakatikim ako ng apat na injection sa iba’t ibang site ng katawan. Ouch! At umaabot ng dalawang beses sa isang lingo. Ouch! Tapos naging lingguhan at buwanan. Hindi ko maitatanggi ang sakit na naranasan ko dahil sa asong yun. Mabangis. Ouch talaga!

            At last month, naranasan ko ulit ang injection dahil sa 1^st dose ko ng Hepa B vaccine. Akala ko masakit noong una pero hindi naman pala. Chika lang.

            At ngayong lingo hindi maalis sa akin ang takot sa 2^nd dose ng Hepa B vaccine, alam nyo bang tinakasan ko yun at imbes na magpabakuna e nag-exam na lang ako sa school paper namin ( Vox Populi ). Naisip kong mas mabuti pang mahirapan sa exam kesa masaktan sa injection. At least alam kong makakalaban ako sa exam kesa sa bakuna.

            Akala ko pwede kong takasan ang vaccine, hindi pala. Baka raw kasi mawalan ng bisa yung 1^st dose kapag hindi agad nasundan. Kaya naman pagkatapos ng lahat ng exam ko, nagdecide na ako na mgpavaccine. Mas mabuti pala, kasi ang kasama ko e mas takot pa sa akin, kaya naman nagtapang tapangan na ako (kahit nanlalamig at pinagpapawisan na ako). Bago pa kasi ako makaupo e tumambad na sa akin ang ibang students na tapos na sa vaccine, isa lang sagot nila sa akin. Masakit talaga

Hindi ko alam kung anong mararamdaman ko pagkakita pa lang sa needle at syringe. Naisip ko tuloy na bakit

noon

matapang ako sa mga injection. Epekto ba ito ng pagtanda o nasobrahan ako sa anti-rabies na pati sarili kong bangis e nawala? Ewan ko nga ba.

Bago pa ako turukan e nakipagchikahan muna ako sa doktora para mawala kahit konti ang nerbiyos. Pero wala akong nagawa at tinuloy na niya ang injection. Ilang seconds lang at natapos na. Sa wakas, meron na akong 2^nd  dose ng Hepa B vaccine. Batay sa experience na iyon, bigla akong nagtaka kung bakit sinasabi nilang masakit daw yun. Nararamdaman ko lang ang animoy paggapang ng gamot na parang nangalay ang braso ko. Hindi ko naman naramdaman yung sakit na iniisip ko. Mabangis pa pala ako.

Naisip kong merong pa akong naranasang mas masakit kesa sa Hepa B vaccine na iyon tulad ng mga sumusunod:

ü      Dysmenorhea

ü      Sore eyes

ü      Singaw

ü      Acute gastroenteritis

ü      Pagkapaso sa tambucho ng motorcycle

ü      Pamamaga ng legs kaya hindi nakalakad

ü      Finals sa org

ü      Anti rabies vaccine

ü      Anti – tetanus vaccine at skin test

ü      Matinding galit , pagod at gutom

ü      At wala ng sasakit sa 1^st time……harharhar

Paano nga ba masasabing masakit ang isang bagay? Parang hinihiwa, tinutusok, pinupunit, hapdi , etc? Iba’t iba ang ating paghusga at pagsukat sa pakiramdam ng sakit pero anuman ang ibig sabihin nito, dapat maging masaya tayo dahil naramdaman natin ito, palatandaan na buhay tayo. Hindi lang sakit ang dulot ng sakit, isa itong paraan ng pagharap sa katotohanan na ang buhay ay pakikipaglaban. Kailangan lang nating maging matatag at matapang.

Kaya sa mga susunod pang vaccine, siguro hindi na ako matatakot at haharapin ko na ito ng buong tapang. Ngunit hindi ko maipapangako na hindi na ako masasaktan, habang nabubuhay mararamdamn natin ang sakit, maisasambit din ang katagang “ouch”. Basta ang mahalaga ay matuto at maging matured samga bagay.

At sa panahong maging nurse na ako, marahil mabibingi ang aking mga tainga sa salitang “ouch”.

Hindi na ako magtataka o maninibago dahil alam kong normal lang ito.

OUCH !

                  Are you afraid of the dark?                          

I am.

I wrote this stuff because I recently became afraid of the dark. Funny it is. What do you think?

Before I am a night person, I enjoyed walking along the streets and greens while the cool air is blowing. I can stay till dawn in the campus doing some overnight activities like watching concerts and plays, org rituals, doing lab in micro, reviewing in the tambayan, fixing exhibit,making projects,eating, drinking, or just chatting with some friends or classmates. It is also the best time to be with someone you love who inspires you in every way, lying on the field(not what you think!)and just watching the stars till you see the last one in the dark.

Silence.

Darkness is usually accompanied by silence. That silence will give us dreams that are mostly chaotic. I always imagine that I can be caught by a vampire, that creature will drink my blood, take my breath away, send me into oblivion and share their immortality and powers with me. The thing is that I want some powers that vampires have. And I can have it only in the dark.

Power.

During the middle of the night,when everything seems so dark, have you experienced a sudden feeling of power? Just the power of the mind, when you can fully concentrate and that ideas are overflowing, especially when you don’t need and least expect it. The time when you best laid the plans for the next hours and days.

Darkness under the sheets.

Have you experienced crying under the sheets? When you feel so hurt, the only way to express it is to cry in the night, shout against the dark, and wish you were sleeping, like the silence of the tomb when you can be at peace.

These were the things I love about the dark.

However, a few days ago, I began to hate it. Being alone in the dark accompanied with silence becomes suffocating. I started breathing heavily feeling that I have less of oxygen in my blood. Numbness creeps in me that I cannot feel my own flesh. I was awaken and began to cry. It was really fearful. I thought I would never be awakened. I began to realize that I cannot stand the feeling of a sudden death.

I am afraid of the dark because I am afraid to die.

I am afraid of seeing darkness forever.

And I fear the feeling of never continuing to live.

I still have things to do to make my life worth living.

I cannot die now.

Note: This is the original article I’ve sent to Youngblood-Philippine Daily Inquirer last Oct 18,2006. It was edited and published on Oct. 31, 2006 issue at page A11 Opinion section.

                  To walk or not to walk? That is the question.  

I chose not to walk.

Recently, we were required to participate in the so-called “Alay-Lakad”. But I did not participate. Perhaps, many will think that I am really a stubborn student or “pasaway”. Judge me not for I have my reasons, sound and sensible.

What does this activity mean to me?

It is a service that is given freely, shared for goodwill and purpose, completed through walking around a community or a certain place.

Apparently, I decided not to join because there is no main purpose or objective given in doing the activity. Is it about arousing the mind and heart of mankind on living a quality life? Will it help decrease drug abuse, prostitution, child labor, crime, or environmental degradation? Does it mean to educate people on health, social, political, and spiritual rights? I believe every activity has its own time and purpose. But this one I think is about obedience.

I’d rather participate in a student rally to express the right as an individual and exercise freedom, to awaken the mankind on the essence of justice and on being firm and dignified as a Filipino.

I also consider participation in a medical mission a true achievement. It will provide health care and teachings in our people to help them become more responsible and independent on their health.

It is also beneficial to plant trees in the community and educate people about cleanliness and preservation of the environment. There are other things which are essential to do that by merely walking.

If the activity is “given freely”, then why is it considered a requirement? If one fails to participate, does it equate punishment? Then the real essence of the activity is measured by compliance, not by the fulfillment and achievement felt on doing a sensible thing.

Walking is a good exercise. But it is not always good depending on the motive. It can be a tool to exercise good will or power. It is not bad to walk with others, but if an action becomes unreasonable, then it is better to stand still, and not to follow. Sometimes disobedience becomes good and right. It becomes meaningful and defines man’s rationalism.

That is the reason why on earth at my age I never attended any activity of that kind. I hope next time I can participate, that is, only when walking becomes worthy.

____________________________________________________________________________________________________ An essay written by Joyce Lou G. Penales, BS Biology , University of the Philippines -Los Baños, and currently taking up BS Nursing in University of Perpetual Help System.

    I am back again as a student but in a different university. Before, I had a hard time choosing a school, but of course this one complied on my busy and active life.

    Culture shock is one thing I have experienced again, since it’s a new university for me,new system, definitely  I have to follow new rules.

    We are only allowed to wear proper uniform, with school ID, and nameplate. No earrings, bracelet, anklet, or rings. Hair should be in "boknay". Some instructors were requiring students to purchase a book as a reference and will be given added points. There are a lot of requirements which can be measured by points or grades. Attendance is a must and is graded.

    I am four months in this academe, sometimes I wish that I am still studying in my previous school where academic freedom is prioritized, where we can assert ourselves, where we can learn the things essential in life. I am reminded of the past. Reminisces, pieces of yesterday, everything.

    Again, I have to write on my notes, review lessons, listen to the professors, and do research. The difference is that I have to pay now for the knowledge and skills and for everything in the university. I have to recite the hymn and prayer. And follow the rules strictly.

   For now I need to do these things to attain my goal.

   I need to conform to survive.

   

   

   

For the times I’ve hurt you

I was dying as if my blood was drained.

My agony builds,

Moment by moment,

Tears never stop, blurring my eyes.

As I gazed upon your loving eyes,

I confess….

From the moment I tasted life,

Your love had sustained me,

In my seconds of solitude,

In minutes of restless soul,

Even a lifetime!

By this I can never endure

The pain I’ve caused you.

For your sorrow is my sorrow,

Your hapiness is my hapiness.

Beyond any power of death,

You are the man in my mere existence.